Halloween Spooktacular 2019 Movies

It’s that time of the year again, when the fronts of stores are packed with oversized bags of cheap candy, while in the back they’re sneaking in Christmas decorations. Yep, the season of the witch is upon us, and here’s the list of movies we’ll be discussing on our special, only at patreon.com/besottedgeek. List to be updated as we add more, so check back often!

  1. Apostle
  2. Cloverfield
  3. Terrifier
  4. House
  5. The Autopsy of Jane Doe
  6. As Above, So Below
  7. Mercy Black
  8. The Satanic Rites of Dracula
  9. Await Further Instructions
  10. The House That Dripped Blood
  11. Triangle
  12. Creepshow 2
  13. The Perfection
  14. Wendigo
  15. The Open House
  16. Creep (2004)
  17. Creep (2014)
  18. Terror in the Wax Museum
  19. In the Tall Grass
  20. A Nightmare on Elm Street 3: Dream Warriors
  21. Insidious
  22. Trilogy of Terror
  23. Don’t Knock Twice
  24. Scream
  25. The Conjuring
  26. From Dusk Till Dawn
  27. Would You Rather
  28. Cursed
  29. Creep 2
  30. 1st Summoning
  31. Before I Wake
  32. Bone Tomahawk

Badly Recapped: Blossoms 666 #5

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CULLEN BUNN – story

LAURA BRAGA – art

JACK MORELLI – lettering

MATT HERMS – coloring

 

Synopsis in a Sentence: Cheryl and Jason use treachery and knives to better their odds at becoming the Anti-Christ.

 

This is it! The big conclusion to Archie Horror mini Blossoms 666! Except it isn’t. Wah-wah.

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If you didn’t think I’d be using Riverdale GIFs during this review, you know nothing Jon Snow.

 

We start this final (ahem) issue with Dilton in jail contemplating suicide, Archie and Veronica under a spell to make out, Julian Blossom consoling Betty who saw said make-out session, and Ethel taking Jughead to the altar of Abaddon in the woods. And that’s just page 1 folks.

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Ethel shows a shocked Jughead the Abaddon statue, then pulls out a knife, presumably to sacrifice our crown wearing compadre, but instead falls on the blade herself after Juggy refuses to sacrifice her.

Time to catch up with Cheryl and Jason, who are lounging around a pool pondering how to get rid of new rival to the horns, Julian. Cheryl gets pulled under water by a pool cleaner- the mechanical kind, not the sexy kind.

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Dance for me Pool Boy!

 

Where was I? Is it hot in here? Oh yeah, Cheryl’s getting attacked, and Jason actually jumps in and saves her, even though they are currently locked in a battle to become Anti-Christ. But since they’ve been siblings all their lives, and twins at that, they’ve formed a pact to get rid of new-to-the-scene bro Julian first. Still, Jason had a golden opportunity there to narrow the field, but I digress.

Meanwhile, Betty and Julian decide to go to the police station to question Dilton, only to find him hung in his cell. Alas, poor Dilton, we hardly knew ye. Betty runs outside and bumps into Jughead, who tells her Julian is trying to become the Anti-Christ, at the behest of the other two Blossoms. Yep, Jason called in his favor from earlier in the series. Betty slaps Julian upside the head, and now he doesn’t have his key pawn in the game.

Julian goes home and tells his bro and sis that was a dirty trick, having Jughead tell Betty the truth. And then Cheryl and Jason take turns stabbing him. Even though earlier, in this very issue, they kind of ruled out blatant murder. Which is why they had Jughead tell Betty, to one-up Julian that way. This part really doesn’t make sense, but they laugh it off saying mom and dad will be mad. Really?

We close up with some bizarre panels of Jughead and Betty at Pop’s, then the twins teasing each other about what they’ll make the other do if they win the title. Oh, and Julian’s corpse in the morgue sitting up. That’s it. And the obligatory The End Question Mark.

Overall Blossoms 666 has been a worthy addition to the Archie Horror titles. Cheryl Blossom is one of my favorite characters, and I liked the Anti-Christ angle of the book. This final issue however left me scratching my head at times and wishing there was a more definitive ending, while still leaving room for future volumes. Otherwise, Cullen Bunn did a good job with the scares and cast of characters, and Laura Braga’s art was top-notch. I hope this team comes back and we get true “winner” between the devilish duo of Riverdale.

 

6.5/10

 

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Badly Recapped: Gideon Falls #15

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JEFF LEMIRE – writer

ANDREA SORRENTINO – artist

DAVE STEWART – colors

STEVE WANDS – lettering & design

 

Synopsis in a Sentence: Father Fred faces his fate in a fraternal Gideon Falls. (Or maybe I just like alliteration too much.)

 

We’ve been following around a time jumping priest the last few issues (Fred’s predecessor?), but now we get back to our main protagonist, Father Fred, who finds himself in a different version (time?) of his Gideon Falls. If memory serves, he had switched places, literally, with the protagonist of this GF, Norton. Norton’s shrink, Dr Xu, is there to confront the father, who has some sort of timey-wimey amnesia, and runs off.

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Fred stumbles across a couple of winos who give him a bottle of booze, and uh-oh, our recovering alcoholic priest doesn’t pass it up. What follows are hallucinations (maybe) of the infamous Black Barn, two guys chasing Fred, and I assume a past meeting with a young woman named Rebecca. She tells the father “He knows,” and I’m led to believe that the two had some sort of romantic tryst, maybe even committing- gasp!- adultery. We even see images of Rebecca hanging, before turning into Smiling-Man.

Meanwhile Dr Xu heads back to Norton’s and takes one of his little surgical masks before heading back to the last place she saw Norton. She find’s the father’s collar there, tracks him down not far away, has a bit of confusing back and forth with him, and then asks what he knows about the Black Barn. The end.

This issue felt short, but maybe it was just the quick pacing that had me burning through the pages. There were the usual bits of WTF moments, scares, and added intrigue with the Rebecca mystery. As usual, Sorrentino’s art style matched Lemire’s tone, and we got another good issue of Gideon Falls.

 

8.5/10

 

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“Leprechaun 3” Drinks

It’s our 3rd annual St. Paddy’s Spectacular, and you know what that means- the third entry in the Leprechaun film series!

Shot: Gold Shilling, what yet again our diminutive demon leprechaun is after. If he loves his gold so much, why does he keep losing it?

2/3oz Irish whiskey, 1/3oz cinnamon schnapps

Cocktail: The Lucky Shamrock, the crappy casino where most of the “action” takes place. Did I mention the movie is set in Las Vegas? Yeah….

Shake 1oz each green creme de menthe, white creme de cacao, and Irish cream over ice. Strain into an ice-filled rocks glass.

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Another St. Patrick’s Day, another Leprechaun movie in the books. And they start getting really bad after this one. For our complete thoughts on the drinks, movie, and much more, check out podcast 143, here:

https://besottedgeek.podbean.com/e/143-st-paddys-day-spectacular-19-leprechaun-3/

“From Hell” Drinks

We kind of had to scramble for a movie this week, and Peacock had no input on the drinks, so if you don’t like them #BlameStork.

Shot: Grapes, the delicacy Jack uses multiple times to lure unfortunates to their demise.

1/4oz Dubonnet Rouge, fill red wine

Cocktail: Abberline Absinthe Cocktail, a take on the favorite libation of Johnny Depp’s character.

In a small stemmed glass stir together 1/2tsp sugar, dash Peychaud’s bitters, 1.5oz absinthe, and a splash of water.

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If you’re wondering why we covered From Hell in the first place, it was Stork’s pick for winning our year-long games competition on the podcast. Speaking of which, find out our thoughts on the movie, drink, and much more on podcast 135, here:

https://besottedgeek.podbean.com/e/135-from-hell/

“The Chilling Adventures of Sabrina” Drinks

You have to be adventurous to try the shot, but the cocktail isn’t too chilling! (Anybody else want to write these intros? I’m embarrassing myself here.)

Shot: Batty Bat, after the sleep demon in one of the, if not the, best episodes of the show.

1/2oz each bourbon and brandy. Almost knocked out Peacock.

Cocktail: Cemetery Mudslide, referring to a spell that went horribly wrong.

1oz each dark rum, coffee liqueur, and Irish cream; dash chocolate bitters. Shake over ice and strain into a cocktail glass. Any resemblance to the drink known as a Mudslide is purely intentional.

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The shot could’ve been better, but hey, the show could’ve been better too. Check out our thoughts on both, plus a draft of favorite pop culture witches, on podcast 126, here:

https://besottedgeek.podbean.com/e/126-the-chilling-adventures-of-sabrina/

“The Haunting of Hill House” Drinks

We were blown away by the overall quality of The Haunting of Hill House, so we just had to review it and invent some drinks to go along with this fantastic show.

Shot: Tea Party, and I’m not even going to spoil it; you’ll just have to watch Hill House to get the reference.

1/2oz each iced tea and amaretto

Cocktail: Shirley Crain, an adult take on the children’s classic drink, the Shirley Temple.

Fill a highball glass with ice. Add 1.5oz vodka and 1/2oz pomegranate liqueur. Fill with lemon-lime soda and stir.

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Two decent drinks for an incredible show. For our full thoughts on both and much more scary fun, check out our Halloween special podcast, here:

https://besottedgeek.podbean.com/e/124-halloween-spooktacular-3-all-the-horror/